Plant Polyamory! Spread the love. - Greeting Card

Regular price $1.82
Pressed Lettering
Envelope Included

One Card Is Never Enough:

Pick a favorite, then grab a few more so you're not caught empty-handed next month.


Monogamy was attempted. There was one pothos, one windowsill, one uncomplicated arrangement — and then a fern followed you home, and a monstera needed rescuing, and somewhere around the ninth pot the household admitted what it had become. This is not a problem to be managed. Each plant is known individually: which one sulks in direct sun, which one wants turning on Sundays, which one has been dramatically dying for two years without ever following through. The attention is not rationed among them. It expands to cover the census. That is the whole arrangement, thriving on every surface, and this card endorses it completely. Add another. There is always room.

Product detail
  • Occasion/category:
  • Tone: Funny
  • Inside status: Blank inside
  • Paper finish: Uncoated/Matte
  • Paper weight: 110lb
  • Inclusion: White envelope
  • Printing method: Letterpress
Dimension
  • Folded Size: 3.5 inches wide, 4.6 inches length
  • Unfolded Size: 7 inches wide, 4.6 inches length
  • Envelope Size: 3.75 inches wide, 4.8 inches length

Finally, Cards That Know What a Monstera Is

The greeting card industry has not yet been informed that plant people exist. It knows about golfers, it knows about grandmothers, it maintains a full inventory of cards for retired admirals — but the person with forty pots, a propagation station, and a grow light with better real estate than the television? Invisible. There is no drugstore card for the day the monstera unfurls a new leaf, which is strange, because that day is celebrated harder than most weddings. We made these cards to correct the oversight. Plant people are our people — devoted, slightly unhinged, capable of grieving a fern for longer than a relationship — and they deserve stationery that speaks the language. Plant lady declarations. Monstera romance. Congratulations on the baby plant, offered with complete sincerity, because propagation is a birth announcement whether the rest of the world accepts it or not. Each card is letterpressed, foil-stamped, and blank inside, so there's room for watering instructions, a confession about the succulent you killed, or a genuine feeling smuggled in between jokes. Clip one to a cutting and it becomes a complete gift. The drugstore still hasn't noticed. Their loss, verifiably — and the monstera, for the record, has never looked better.

Round Out the Gift With These

Make sure to delete your search history!

Some occasions are layered enough to need reinforcements. Make sure to delete your search history! hands the last word to whoever is still listening.

Sexy beasts like you need a little greenery, so I got you a plant.

One of the beloveds has a card too: Sexy beasts like you need a little greenery opens that particular courtship.

Fennel Vegetable Seeds

Fennel vegetable seeds join the collective — feathery, generous, and perfectly comfortable sharing a bed with everyone else.


Pressed, Foiled, and Blank on Purpose. — Chive Greeting Cards

Chive Studio has been making things for plant people since 2004 — ceramic flowers, seed packets, pots, and now the cards to go with them — largely because we are plant people, with the windowsills and the grief to prove it. These designs are drawn and letterpressed in-house by staff who have personally apologized to a dying fern, so the jokes come from lived experience rather than market research. Foil-stamped, heavyweight, blank inside: sturdy enough to clip to a cutting, sincere enough to mean it. If the recipient names their plants, we made this card specifically for them, and we both know it.


Inside the Chive Design Studio

No wrapping skills required. We'll make the gift look like you tried harder than you did.


Frequently asked questions

Does it come with an envelope?

Yes — every card ships with a matching envelope, ready to write, seal, and send.

What size is the card?

Each card measures 4.8" tall by 3.5" wide — letterpress printed and stamped in gold or silver foil.

Is the inside blank, or is there a printed message?

Blank inside, on purpose — because you can write better than we can.

How does it ship?

Every card ships in a rigid mailer, so it arrives just as crisp as the day it was pressed.

Who designs these cards?

We do — every card is designed in-house at Chive Studio, the same way we've done it since 2004. No licensed clip art, no committee, no algorithm that thinks you'd also enjoy a golf pun. One of us thought of it, one of us pressed it, and now it's your problem.

Should I get gold or silver foil?

Whichever one you like — it's purely personal choice, and we refuse to invent a rule about it. Gold reads warmer, silver reads sharper, and the joke hits identically in both. Where a design offers both, pick the one that suits the recipient, or the one that suits you. They're not going to send it back.

What kind of paper are the cards printed on?

110 lb cardstock — the heavy stuff. Thick enough to survive the mail, the fridge door, and several years of being rediscovered in a drawer and laughed at again. Letterpress printing needs paper with some spine, and this has it.

Can you ship the card directly to the recipient?

Yes. Put their address at checkout and it goes straight to them. Just remember the inside is blank — if you want it to say something, ship it to yourself first, write the thing, and mail it like your grandmother would have. We press them; the sentiment is your department.

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Gift Guide

Birth Flowers, the Gift That Actually Means Something

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